Thursday, December 2, 2010

how to be a goodfriend? :\

Not a very bad day, but not the best either. 
Alex and I, we're so close. I love how we cuddle so often. He'll puts his arms around my waist and holds me close. I really like that. 
I don't know if it was just me, but we had a moment at lunch. Almost kissed? I don't know. Our nose touched, that's it. It didn't last long. I kind of got nervous and hugged him instead. I don't know how to kiss someone. It's been a long time since I last kiss someone. 3 years ago? When I was leaving my dad to come to Canada ... Last kiss I had with him , last time I ever got to see him. How depressing huh? 


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Tearing up. Stopping those tears, trying my best. They're just spinning in my eyes, not coming down any sooner. Not letting them. Because I'm strong. At least trying to be. 


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I'm not a very good girlfriend. At least I don't think so. I don't know how to be a good girlfriend. I never had a 'REAL' relationship before Alex. that movie double date, was the VERY FIRST date I ever went on. Quite embarrassing huh? I know. I really don' t know how to act like the perfect girlfriend. Sigh.  Story of my life.


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She was pmsing again. Came into the room trying to find something to argue about.
Wow, just had a deja vu on typing a blog. How weird. I have so many deja vus you have no idea.





Archery tomorrow for gym, I can't wait. I can be like Katniss :D shooting the aarow into a target. I can pretend I'm in the arena or the woods she hunts in beside district 12. Hunting for the careers or a rabbit in the woods. Imagine myself. I can do that, at least i try. I know I can. I wish i was katniss, able to shoot at anything. I wish i could just buy a real bow and shoot around in the woods. That oughta be fun, right? 


;


in depression ...  


end here tonight ... 
veewang



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